The Tinman or Dismissive Avoidant Attachment Style

Second in a row in four attachment styles:
Dismissive Avoidant attachment style (acronym - DA):
So, who's that grumpy, calm loner, who wonders about the heart? :)
It's the Tin-man, aye.
You know those cool kids around, who are lonely but do it because of their own choice, they just withdraw? These usually are dismissive avoidants :D Now they don't seem so cool, since they do it only because they have some unresolved issues from before? But they still are cool, at least in the way.
What to say more about dismissive avoidants? hmm

• they highly rely on their intelligence and hardly on emotions.
• emotional world, feelings seem to be slightly another world to them, the world filled with danger.
• they seem to be holding themselves for someone better, greater, more achieving, better looking whatever their best qualities are, they will show them as their own true-self image but it's really just some show-off to avoid showing a more vulnerable, emotional side, they don't trust it.
• practical, calculating, like to save things, planning future, planning need to withdraw. 
• dismissive avoidant was raised in an environment that was hurtful to them, so they learned to cope alone, which was a more safe option to hold. They save resources because if they habitual knowing, they might need to get back to solitude and survive on their own. Dismissive avoidants, if not dealing directly, healing their interrelational issues and habits, will pick a partner, who will or possibly would hurt them, without hurt they wouldn't recognize the bond as a "loving" one. Weird. I know... still it is possible to change your attachment style.

Ok, so if going further:

• DAs are achievers, they are best in the intellectual part of relationships.
• you like to sit them forever while having stimulating, highly interesting, magnetic discussions that don't seem like ending... The whole day, the whole night, it's too good to end.
• disciplined, planned, no gaps, no not necessary details, working like a clock. I just remembered Immanuel Kant and that story that people were checking their clock's accuracy by the daily routine of this man.
• they easily seduce your brain :D and body. So calm, so private, so stable.
• they tend to run from anything emotional, they don't trust it, emotions = hurt - not predictable, not sustainable something that will storm them back into their shell, and your relationship will be too threatening to maintain, so they will abandon it for the need to go back to safety: clear, cold, rational, doing/thinking life. Heart = danger, chaos, and so on. 
• they are detached/dissociated from their emotional, sensual world. 
• 25% of the western population are dismissive avoidants. 

In the land of Oz dismissive avoidant character for me is the Tinman :) calm, trustworthy metal giant, that can't deal on his own with that liquid oil and can't move on by himself, if happens to be stuck. Yep, overthinking and spinning in one place in your thoughts s*cks, I can relate. You can also see lots of similar characters as robots :) they understand they don't have emotions and can reach the same difficulty and richness in the crazy emotional world that people have... and all the patterns and mimicking human behavior can't bring them this chaotic although super powerful feature... so they are just left to evolve their calculations with the hope that one day they will reach difficulty and complexity of the heart. 
There are online courses, therapists, also friends, who are ok with their emotions and might be a good lead to explore your America, DAs, best luck! (And quit smoking.... for god's sake🚭)​

There are quite good quotes by Immanuel Kant, here couple of them:
"Rules for Happiness: something to do, someone to love, something to hope for." 
"Do the right thing because it is right."
Or these below ⬇️ (maybe:D)​

Remember the Tinman 🤖

oh, and don't try to remember to push on the tinman