Hello, today's topic is about the narcissistic way of socialising, so we could take a few terms to talk about. Today those terms are Word Salad, Kernel of Truth, also borderline disorder can be touched but it's the secondary focus for me here.
Definitions by Wikipedia for Word Salad: A word salad [...] is a "confused or unintelligible mixture of seemingly random words and phrases". [...] The words may or may not be grammatically correct, but are semantically confused to the point that the listener cannot extract any meaning from them.
Definitions by Oxford Languages for Word Salad: a confused or unintelligible mixture of seemingly random words and phrases.
Synonym: gibberish, incoherency.
Definition by APA Dictionary of Psychology for Kernel of Truth: the idea that stereotypes, despite being exaggerated generalizations about a group of diverse individuals, sometimes contain elements that accurately describe the qualities of the stereotyped group.Definition by Saylor Academy for Kernel of Truth: a stereotype is a generalized belief about the qualities or characteristics of a particular group of people.
Synonym: a fragment, a hint.
Also, borderline rage moments could be mentioned here but... that's another issue and I am not a big fan of pathologizing people's behaviour in any way, so maybe I pass on this.
To tell it straight and shortly for me Word Salad is when someone just has this.. sort of fluent and repetitive way of talking in a way that actually says nothing much. You can call it small talk, you can call it an extravert feature, you can call it an ice-breaker but sometimes it can be a narcissist's way to gaslight their conversation partner. Again, I guess, some people just copy that from their guardian's behaviour and that really can be just a part of their tools for communication. How would you know, if it's used for the wrong reasons? You can know if it doesn't change for a long time if the person can't lose it and turn the conversation another way, where it can start to have an actual meaning... And also, if your relationship with that word salad serving person never changes, if he/she remains the same, serving the same salad, never planning, never showing some more solid moves towards you. Especially in relationship building beginning or similar people might get nervous, anxious and unsure, so things might get messy but it shouldn't bring you into endless spirals of this verbal defensiveness out of nervousness, if you try to support and care and it's obvious or you are simply straight and telling, you are ok to build something together. this has to help that person to relax if he/she can't relax and start being more clear and also hearing you out and inviting you to join into dialogue... that might be an issue. It also might be a copy of a person's parents' or guardians' behaviour and if that person copied it very very early in their infanthood, it might stay with them. In this case, I just wish that someone would be ok with this type of expression, it's erratic, eccentric, and aimless. It's never personally against anyone, just some people are more eccentric, others - less, some like eccentric, some don't, seems fair enough. So here, I guess, I have best wishes to find you, eccentric someone, if you like that :D or ordinary someone, if that's "the wheels" that you prefer; also be aware, if you're into trouble with someone, who can't really control themselves and you will need to do that for them or they just need some continuous, repetitive signs of acceptance and reassurance of your presents. Even most nervous and anxious people simply calm down, if there is a guarantee they won't be dumped as another garbage piece out of somebody's life. You know it, everyone does. We just forget... life's busy, everyone runs and roses are left without smelling them. :/
Ok, on Kernel of Truth for me it's when a person hooks you up with some fragments or hints of something or someone and you start wondering, how it is for real... since it's often mixed with some dubious or foggy facts too. With Words Salad I tend to wait until the person starts to feel calm enough to reveal themselves, with Kernel of Truth I tend to wait too... since time can show off the real face of a person's interests and knowledge. Again this might occur at the start of knowing each other, a person might wish to understand, what they have similar to you, what are your opinions on some groups, where you stand your-self in social ways in politics, sexuality, finances, hobbies, activities, psychologically, so on. So often they might be really not clear, while they themselves are trying to understand, where you stand yourself :D and then plenty of misunderstandings appear... But steadily and slowly it clears out. Again, this defensiveness might come from someone, who has this toxicity against some groups of people and simply is prejudiced and wants to find either similar people or anyone to brainwash into prejudice... Best wishes to stay patient with a hint of wisdom and look closer at each one, you might evaluate as intolerant...
Ah yes, also it might come exactly from the family they grew up in, they might have been integrated prejudice against people like themselves. I talk a lot about these guys: Blacksheep and scapegoat being pushed and targeted constantly, but mainly... they got it in their childhood and mainly they don't like themselves so much not because they chose so, they don't like something about them but because that was basic rule no one could touch ever. It was about some particular features being even considered to be ever ok or even too gross to talk about it... So now deep down inside stayed the same - disliking, hating it in them, going to fight for those qualities to be accepted and failing again... It's not outside already, it's deep inside... And it's still learned, so this disliking and hating can be dismantled and changed :) BEST NEWS so far :D Since about some features I am black-sheep/scapegoat too but slowly learning to dismantle self-hatred and :) it feels amazing to do so. Best luck to all 🌐💮🤍💮 🌐
Pain au chocolat (from French) - one of the most famous chocolate pastry in France
Here are also some words' and stuff mixed for illustration from Youtube's crafts: Celebrities Go to a Fancy Restaurant ಠ_ಠ
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