Here it is the list of values... Because I annoyed myself enough with only talking about it and not doing it, although really, REALLY, man, it's not that easy to make such a matrix or something similar, so to speak, you don't have to drive yourself crazy about it too.
One way or another, after internal dramas or simply deathly inner silence, I created it.
Mhm, and now here are some comments on this simply wonderful piece of mine :D
1) God in this matrix isn't necessarily what it is for all Catholics or other Christians, but he is also not just an ordinary concept that does not mean anythingbut just an outdated and worn-out character of the Bible and some other widely spread books. In this context god is the sum of all values, the embodiment of all possible virtues... You may ask, why, if science is some kind of integration of all truth-reality, then the concentration of virtues cannot be something neutral, rational, such as morality... hm, to be honest, I don't really know the answer. However, in religion, God often also has another role, which is usually called logos and it relates to pure rationality... Maybe the answer is: you just don't want to completely become a robot and reduce everything to a neutral, lifeless machinery, but leave space for nature instead, for something that is simply too difficult for one person with one consciousness to grasp.
In psychology, or maybe even in general, the balance between emotions and rationality is quite important... Even the heart has its own neurons (more info - here), and the brain is actually the organ that feels, although the sensations of those feelings and emotions come to us physically through the area of the heart .
2) The four columns of values in the matrix pic are taken from the book King Warrior Magician Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine, which is not really a textbook, but rather my choice coupled with my inclination for grouping. It could also be divided into, say:
- Psychology (Magician equivalent)
- LGBT activities (Warrior equivalent)
- Arts (Lover equivalent)
- Community (King equivalent)
3) How to distinguish whether a person has similar or different value systems and so... Well, if you see that some directions do not correspond radically to yours... for example: the opinion of others is not very important to me, well, it is important, I take it into account, because it helps to keep yourself up to date and to improve, but in reality I still mostly rely on my intuition, etc. I listen to people when I know that they are much more knowledgeable in some area than I am, for example in politics or computers or music making or the society of some other country, etc. So, going back to the topic: if a person is very attentive to decency, normativity, etc., this may conflict with my tendency to value authenticity and honesty; and this conflict would arise because something fundamental in both would be violated. However, all the blocks of values should be reviewed, because perhaps the truth and it's honest expression are as important to the person (person that holds decency, normativity for their virtues) as subtlety and tolerance are important to me (even, if I hold authenticity and honesty as virtues too), so it is not necessary that there will be a strong conflict in communication anyway.
If sports are important to a person and not arts.... If his/her direction in life is the career in specific profession rather than community… you just won't find many topics for comunication to each other in the long run and any effort to build this family cabin will be doomed. Compatibility is what determines almost everything, because love can ignite quite often... (at least for me, I almost certainly fall in love with someone who feels something similar to me :D) it's just not an essential indicator, although without it there would be nothing to talk about. And if an union is possible, where love does not slip towards other people, I have not yet experienced it, so it is pointless to theorize about it.
Behold and have a nice time :)) spring has sprung after all 💐
And this ⬇️ is exactly what ruins everything... ⬇️ with those buttons, although hm, probably it's the other way around, really :)) ⬇️
P.s.: compatibility isn't sameness or being different... it's just that directions in your life - your most important values must not be in an ongoing conflict with another person's directions. About this topic - in the next entry.
This is my blog about self-knowledge, self-work, emotional healing, growth, psychology, philosophy in general and other related themes.